Today is Mark Twain's Birthday

Today is Mark Twain's (Samuel Clemens) birthday so I though I would share a few of my favorite quotes:

I will start with a few on government:

It could probably be shown by facts and figures that there is no distinctly native criminal class except Congress.

Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.

We have the best government that money can buy.

What is the difference between a taxidermist and a tax collector? The taxidermist takes only your skin.

(Too bad things have not improved much since his day.)

Some quotes about society in general:

Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.

It is by the goodness of God that in our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practice either of them.

When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.

The rule is perfect: in all matters of opinion our adversaries are insane.

All you need is ignorance and confidence and the success is sure.

Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest.

By trying we can easily endure adversity. Another man's, I mean.

Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.

Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example.

It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.

The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.

Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.

Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits.

If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.

And my personal favorite:

Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.